Sunday, 22 January 2012

jan 21, 2012

this is my belated post from yesterday - half-written last night and half-written tonight!

i've been trying to figure out all day what to write about for this post, and it was in the shower tonight that i had an aha moment. like so many of us who lost things that were important to us last year, 2011 kicked my ass in terms of my confidence. i'm normally a pretty flirty femme, but one of the things that i've noticed of late is that i'm feeling spooked by my desire. in the moment, i sense it's happening, but i try to suppress it quickly and hope the other person doesn't notice. i guess it's about fear? about it feeling too vulnerable? not wanting to look like a fool?

anyway, one of the main points of doing this blog is to mend things, resolve things and grow. so i want to challenge this. yesterday and today, i've been working to express more desire. to feel it and accept it and act on it if the space is there to do that. if i notice a beautiful creature, i look at them and smile - feel the desire and let it be seen. be open enough for possibility to do its thing. i have a feeling this one is going to open me up in a way i really want and also be a hell of a lot of fun.

as inspiration, i've posted a pic of annie sprinkle from one of her recent projects with her partner in art and life, beth stephens. annie is one of my personal heroes because of her incredible openness and sex positivity. she does exactly what she wants and has reached a level of integration with sexuality that i think is really dreamy and wonderful. here's hoping i get there, too! wish me luck! :)


  1. Love the photo! Brought a smile to my face. I think a lot of people have a hard time expressing their desires in general, not just sexual ones. I have a lot of emotional desires for friendship, but part of me is always worried the other person won't want to be my friend, or want to get to know me. It all involves opening up and showing something from within yourself though, and getting past the initial flicker of fear is the toughest part.

  2. That's a great picture! And expressing desire is one of the ways we feel fully alive, in my opinion. Stay open :)