at long last, i did the final stage of mending on my winter coat tonight. there's nothing cozier in winter than sitting on a comfy couch with a friend and sewing for a solid couple of hours. letting the conversation meander. i said to my friend f: "all of my stitches are finally out. for the rest of the year, there's only going to be this kind of stitching. stitches in fabric. stitches to hold together friendships. "no drama, no trauma" as my friend s would say.
we talked about a lot of things as i sewed. we talked about the accident last year, about the dislocation he felt about moving countries as a child, about queerness and gender and adoption and the difference between fixing and mending. ("mending," said f. "never fixing. nothing can be fixed.") stitching stitching stitching as we talked. the quiet and clarity it brings to the mind is incredible.